I'm snowed in...

And I've had plenty of time to listen to all these bands who want me to "be their friend!" on Myspace...I think it's time for a little professional advice.

1. Please, please, please edit your songs. I don't care if you love your 4 and a half minute, Muse-like, ambient intro...those of us who are sifting through hundreds of MP3s do not. Make it short and sweet, or include a "radio edit" of your single for us poor folk. (Unless you are Muse, The Mars Volta, or Sigur Ros...in which case...um, keep on doing your thing, man.) Otherwise, us A&R kids might just get bored and not even listen to your amazing vocals and that freakin' awesome guitar solo.

2. If it is obvious that I will never make it to one of your shows, think twice before "friend requesting" me. I will not sign someone I've never heard of AND never seen live, or even have the capability of seeing live. I live in LA most of the time, and Portland the rest. I will not fly out to Minneapolis or Tallahassee just to see your band who has less than a hundred profile views.

3. Include a personal message with your friend request. Without it, you are subject to my moods and whims: depending on the day, I may deny it, I may let it sit for another day when I feel like denying it, or I may actually click through to your page and listen. Option #3 happens very infrequently (I usually just have too much to do!). A personal message will increase the odds of #3 actually occurring.

And, lastly, 4. For the love of all that is holy, when you record, make it sound professional. My job is to hear past bad recording quality, obvious lyric issues, and pitch problems, but it makes it easier for me to hear your true potential if those things are taken care of during the recording process. Plus, since most of those things are so easy to correct nowadays (thank you, non-destructive editing and Garageband), it makes me think that you're just lazy and/or rushed for time...and no one likes an unprofessional band. Make it CD quality, at the very least.